Messy, Stinky Girls

Well, here is the update you've all been dying for. I survived last night! I know you're relieved to know that I didn't fall over with a heart attack brought on by stress, and I'm pretty relieved about it, too. It's always the funniest thing. I stress and get so nervous about teaching/leading a group, but when the time comes, I'm fine. If I could just skip the whole week before, things would be great!

I just have to say that I love women. Not in the weird, inappropriate way, but in a God-fearing way. I was just saying to someone that I didn't have a lot of girl friends in school. I preferred to hang out with guys. But I think that's because women can get messy. I am one, so I can say that. And I should know...I'm pretty messy on the inside. Really, though, we are complicated emotional creatures and things can get crazy if you can actually get another woman to open up and be herself. But I think there's comfort in that. I love knowing that I'm not the only one dealing with crazy, hard, messy stuff. So thanks to all you crazy people I know. :)

For some reason, God has made me a person who is just an open book with other women. (Not so much with my husband, but that's another post.) I will just spill my guts on another woman the second she gives me the opportunity. I usually end up hating myself for it because I feel like an idiot when I'm done, but I continue to do it anyway. There are times when I should just keep my mouth closed, but there are also times when it just helps me so much to get my thoughts and emotions out on the table. Hmmm, it's no wonder most of my posts are boring ramblings of my thoughts instead of cute pictures of my kids. (But most of you have your own cute kids to look at. You don't need to see mine.)

Okay, I'm trying to get to my point. My point is this: God has given us such a great resource in other Christian women, but we do not take full advantage of it. He has given us other beings who can sympathize, understand, show concern, advise, and pray for us, but we are unwilling to be real with one another so all that stuff can happen. We hold in our sinful struggles, our feelings of loneliness, our battles with Satan's lies, our hopes and dreams for whatever reason (pride, maybe???) and we just let it simmer. Before we know it, we've either shut down completely or we boil over and burn everyone around us. My heart's desire is to see and be a part of a sisterhood in Christ that encourages, challenges, and prays for one another constantly. I just want us all to spill our guts all over each other and then help one another clean up the mess. There, how is that for a beautiful and poetic word picture?

And, one more teensy weensy thing. Thanks to all of you who have let me do that spilling of the guts thing on you (that would be everyone who reads this blog), and have in turn opened yourselves up to me. I am privileged to share in this journey with you.