Coming out of a period of weeks where my body, mind, and life in general has been in turmoil, I've realized something. As people have expressed sympathy and love to me and my family, my overriding emotion and response is...GRATITUDE.

I've realized going through this trial (which is so tiny compared to so much of the suffering in this world), that I have nothing left but gratitude. What other response could I have?

I am thankful, first of all, for a personal, loving Father who gives hope and purpose and peace when no one else could. Imagining my life without Him is nearly impossible for me now. I've realized over the past couple of months that I can no longer separate myself from Him or His existence and still call this thing I do everyday LIFE. My life would truly look totally different without Him, and even the thought of spending each day without His presence is a tragic and suffocating thought. I'm so thankful that I get to know God on such a personal basis. Only by His grace.

I am also so overwhelmed and thankful for the love of Jesus as expressed through His body, the church. I have cried out to the Lord so many times over the last few weeks for an expression of His love. Most of this time I have been discouraged, because I've felt like He didn't deliver that. But He has reminded me that He has chosen His people, His bride, as the vehicle to express His love to each individual in this world. I feel so undeserving of the love so many of our friends and family who are members of the body have shown us through calls, emails, texts, and gestures of kindness. It makes me want to do as much for someone else.

Naturally, this whole experience has made me very thankful for my children who jump and scream and hug and cry and need and smile everyday. Who am I to compain when I have a house overflowing with life? I just wish they wouldn't grow up and leave so quickly. And I really do mean that, whether it might seem like it at any given moment or not. :)

So as we begin to move away from this time of turmoil and emotion, I look back with a thankful heart. And I look forward to all that the Lord will continue to use this for in my life and possibly the lives of others. He has already shown me so much about my heart that needs to change. But the wonderful thing is, He has already begun to make those changes for me. He is good and faithful like that, for which I am very thankful.


  1. I am so thankful!! Why is it that I most possess a spirit of thankfulness it a trial, but when everything is going as it should I loose some of that spirit of thankfulness. Lord, please be patient with me. One way we are given a grateful heart is through terrible life struggles. Even though it was difficult beyond words to obtain, I am also so thankful for the gratitude in my heart - it helps put things in a Godly-perspective.

  2. Gratitude and thankfulness are the core of a God-centered joy...praying always for you!


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